Aga Aquino

My youtube feed is full of drama videos, essays, and stand up skits of people who took the time and effort to write scripts that is directed towards attacking certain people for different reasons. May it be political stances, ideologies, religion or social issues, or just because some guy made a stupid comment somewhere at sometime.

For a while I was taking in these negativity with no other reason than because I enjoy my opinion being echoed.

“This guy sucks and the fact that I know this means I’m a good person and I don’t suck”.

This is how it felt sometimes. A good example would be how intensely I followed the saga of Pirate Software, a beloved streamer outed to be a fraud. I would wait for new videos by drama-tubers detailing how Pirate Software dug his own grave with how he speaks, and approaches situation, and seeing the backlash seemed to give me a strange sense of satisfaction.

But stepping back, with each new video, that just seems to go on and on about how Pirate Software is just not a nice guy, I ask myself: “How does this benefit me?”

The thing with schadenfreude is that it’s always punching down. We laugh at the misfortune of other people from the bleachers where we don’t participate in the spectacle, we just spectate.

Having consumed enough drama, I can only feel myself emptier. Because the outrage of learning about the latest shitshow and seeing people get what’s coming to them is tiring.

There may be a short burst of satisfaction of how some random internet guy calls another internet guy a dumbfuck, but then what? It’s on to the next video, and to the next, until the algorithm only wants to feed you irate people saying mean things about others.

I’m not a better person for enjoying the downfall of Pirate Software, I’m not growing learning how much Hasan Piker is not a good guy, I’m not smarter knowing that Jordan Peterson says dumb shit sometimes.

So recently I’m trying to commit to not exposing myself to drama, to not follow random people saying how terrible another person is, as if they are the perfect themselves.

I would be better off reading more books, listening to lectures about topics that I’m interested in, repair guides, farming simulator videos. At least the entertainment I get from these is not at the expense of another human being, as terrible as some people are, I am not any better, nor am I in such a privileged position to judge others.

We are all human with flaws, no one is perfect, and if one guy says or does stupid shit that does not affect me personally, my only place is to ignore and let them fade into obscurity.